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‘Halloween’ icon Michael Myers brags killer ‘work ethic’ makes him the GOAT

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To become the greatest of all time when it comes to mass murderers, Michael Myers proudly puts in the work.

Becoming Hollywood’s most prolific slasher villain is a difficult feat. And one TikToker attributes the success of fictional Myers, whose kills are documented in the “Halloween” franchise, to “work ethic.” A farcical behind-the-scenes look at the cinematic serial killer’s strict regimen currently boasts 4.1 million views.

The hilarious sketch, entitled “An inside interview with the Michael Myers,” shows Myers (actually TikTok user @gavinblake23) boasting about how he’s “one of the greatest ever” while sitting on a plush chair a la “The Ellen DeGeneres Show.” In lieu of his iconic boiler suit, the faux co-ed carver is wearing a swagtastic baller jacket and sunglasses — although he still rocks the classic “William Shatner as Captain Kirk” mask.

“Every morning I wake up: two raw eggs, hit the gym, two, three hours,” the psychopath impersonator brags. “Sauna, cardio, training, weight lifting. I do it all.”

The video shows Myers performing the aforementioned activities in full slasher villain attire.

"Michael Myers" killing the cardio.
“Michael Myers” killing the cardio.

What enables the killer to maintain such a stringent routine? The “knife-wielding maniac” explains that he “cuts off all distractions,” even claiming that he’d rejected an invitation from a bikini-clad Annabelle (the murderous doll of the film series of the same name) to visit Miami because he was busy “working.”

Later, the video lampoons the laughable “Halloween” trope of having Myers magically appear next to his victims.

“Everybody always asks me, ‘How do you get there, when they see you,?” the fake slasher intones over footage of him pursuing a target. “‘They’re running across the building, they’re running down the stairs, they’re running across the parking garage, they’re in their car, they think they’re safe, you’re already there.’”

“‘How do you do that?’ … Work ethic,” he explains. “Nobody work it like me.”

Myers says he turned down an invitation by a bikini-clad "Annabella" doll to join her in Miami.
Myers says he turned down an invitation by a bikini-clad Annabelle doll to join her in Miami.

Myers then proceeds to roast “It” villain Pennywise for claiming he’s “big time.”

“You living in a sewer,” Myers quips. “My condo is $4,800 a month.”

The slasher then boasts that he’s one of “the four greats,” alongside Michael Jordan, Michael Jackson and Michael Phelps.

The clip concludes with Myers telling the supposed interviewer to “wrap this s–t up” because he’s “gotta go murder some motherf–kers.”

Myers is not impressed by the sewer-dwelling clown from "IT."
Myers is not impressed by the sewer-dwelling clown from “It.”

Suffice it to say, the TikTok commentariat thought the sendup was a scream.

“LMFAOOO THE CARDIO,” gushed one horror movie fan.

“Not the Pennywise slander,” said another laugh-stricken commenter.

One TikTok comedian joked that fellow movie slasher villains Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees had 24 hours to respond to the video.

The hilarious parody follows the release of “Halloween Kills,” the horror franchise’s latest installment.



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